winding down...

i started packing some of my things together today. i did some jobs around the school this morning, but then i had to watch the twins in the afternoon while the staff was away for an event at another mission. it was nice to be in a room that had electricity...i just read magazines with the babies on my chest, they're getting easier and easier to take care of, although their cries are getting louder! i'm really going to miss them both, i;ve spent so much time with them over the last week or so, i will have to stay updated on their progress. Hanna Grace and Jeremiah. it is amazing to me that they had been rescued at the brink of death and now they have a wide open future in front of them. it is a miracle at work! cody and i were talking today and we decided that even if the only thing that the mission had ever done was save these two babies, it would be worth it all.




a small pastors group arrived yesterday (3 men, 2 women) so they stayed here last night. this morning they were all complaining about the mosquitos and the heat and not being able to sleep. they even mentioned buying a plane ticket home...they opted to stay at a resort-type thing about 45 minutes away instead of here with us. first i wondered if they knew they were in haiti. then i wondered if they had seen people sleeping in wheelbarrows and filth all around us. then i wondered if they thought they could do the Lord's work without ever getting their hands dirty...
.....


after work i went down to the hope house and the little girls washed my feet in the laundry tubs. dounie kept on pinching the bottom of my foot and when i finally looked i saw that there was a freckle that she was trying to pull off. they took my shoes, purse camera, and water bottle...they all get a kick out of me having to chase them around for my stuff...it's always easy to catch them bc they start laughing so hard that they can't catch their breath.


my last big dinner was really nice...haitian food...brad made an announcement about me leaving on monday. we all sat around joking afterwards...josh shaved all of the boys' heads...i'm really going to miss the staff here....they've accepted and welcomed me from the moment i got here, now we all pal around like we've known each other forever.

i can't believe how much i feel like i just got here. nor can i believe how naturally i slipped into this position. what a window to an entirely different world. so much that i am leaving....mentors in the staff, friends in the interpretors and interns, and many many little children that i've grown to know and love. so much can happen in a month, yet it can fly by so fast. i've been trying not to think so much about leaving, but that of course leaves me with the shock of an abrupt goodbye. how much any of us will keep in contact or how much i'll be remembered, i just don't know. so many people come in and out of missions, i'd like to think i've left a footprint in a mind or a heart, but it's hard to tell. i guess it's inconsequential when compared to the impact that this place has had on me. i've learned so much about myself through this experience...i've gained perspective, questioned my faith, grappled with guilt and inadequacy, and seen things that i wouldn't have believed hadn't i seen them with my own eyes.


it's surprising to me that i leave less with the impression of poverty and depression than i do with awe of haitian pride, resilience, neighborly love, and sincere gratitude to God despite a life of hardships.



my heart sinks to know that i leave in a day, but at the same time i'm leaving with everything (and more) that i could have hoped to gain from this experience. the challenge will be holding on to it all as i become more and more removed with distance and time.